The Goldilocks model of parenting
The Goldilocks model of parenting
Don Dansereau teaches a class in the Mini-University offered to parents by TCU. He has summarized his main points for the Thinkerer:
http://thinkerer.org/Parenting/ParNewLight.htm
I elaborated on two of his points in earlier blogs (one in my Cognitive Engineering blog). Here I take up third.
Children seem to learn best when given the “right amount of help” with homework. In effect, just enough to get them past motivation and understanding barriers. Too much creates dependence and slows growth. Too little can lead to frustration and confusion. Help with planning and thinking about long-term consequences may be especially important.
So how do you know what is the “right amount of help?” Now here is a reassuring answer: You will get it wrong. How can that be reassuring? Because everybody gets it wrong. Even the three bears got it wrong. How many bowls of porridge? How many were just right? Batting average .33. (By the way, if you were playing baseball, what batting average would you be happy with?)
“Right amount of help.” Here is a great example of the power of language to create the wrong amount of credibility. You would think, from the term, that help exists in an amount, that the amount is measurable, and that people could somehow know what amount is right. After all, that works with sugar, doesn’t it?
But children are changing. Today’s right amount of help may be far too much next month. The right amount in May could be inadequate in September. Besides, help comes in kinds as well as amounts.
So what do you do with homework? Start by planning. Not in the privacy of your own head. Work out a plan with the child. Ask the child where you help is needed. Ask what kind of help is needed. Get the child to put the request for help in the form of a question that starts “How can I (the child) find out what I need to do to…”
And do this planning on your own schedule. Early, ahead of time. As soon as possible. The rest of the homework may come later. An early start gets both brains to work on the job. And gives the child a little practice in planning ahead.
Follow that routine and you will soon notice that the child has the plan before you ask. And you will have found the flow around this boulder: Sugar is easier to measure, but cake batter can’t tell you what it needs.
Don Dansereau teaches a class in the Mini-University offered to parents by TCU. He has summarized his main points for the Thinkerer:
http://thinkerer.org/Parenting/ParNewLight.htm
I elaborated on two of his points in earlier blogs (one in my Cognitive Engineering blog). Here I take up third.
Children seem to learn best when given the “right amount of help” with homework. In effect, just enough to get them past motivation and understanding barriers. Too much creates dependence and slows growth. Too little can lead to frustration and confusion. Help with planning and thinking about long-term consequences may be especially important.
So how do you know what is the “right amount of help?” Now here is a reassuring answer: You will get it wrong. How can that be reassuring? Because everybody gets it wrong. Even the three bears got it wrong. How many bowls of porridge? How many were just right? Batting average .33. (By the way, if you were playing baseball, what batting average would you be happy with?)
“Right amount of help.” Here is a great example of the power of language to create the wrong amount of credibility. You would think, from the term, that help exists in an amount, that the amount is measurable, and that people could somehow know what amount is right. After all, that works with sugar, doesn’t it?
But children are changing. Today’s right amount of help may be far too much next month. The right amount in May could be inadequate in September. Besides, help comes in kinds as well as amounts.
So what do you do with homework? Start by planning. Not in the privacy of your own head. Work out a plan with the child. Ask the child where you help is needed. Ask what kind of help is needed. Get the child to put the request for help in the form of a question that starts “How can I (the child) find out what I need to do to…”
And do this planning on your own schedule. Early, ahead of time. As soon as possible. The rest of the homework may come later. An early start gets both brains to work on the job. And gives the child a little practice in planning ahead.
Follow that routine and you will soon notice that the child has the plan before you ask. And you will have found the flow around this boulder: Sugar is easier to measure, but cake batter can’t tell you what it needs.
posted by Selby Evans at 8:29 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home